I feel like Carmen Sandiego...

OK, gumshoes! Notorious gangster Franni Paley has escaped from her hide-out in Dragør and we have been chasing her across the globe! Here are some clues to here whereabouts...

Location #1

Franni was spotted...

Wandering down wide boulevards and narrow alleys of a northern European capital city, paying close attention to the spots where cobblestones become cobblerocks. She then visited a museum dedicated to a notorious Viking ship that sank after only 20 minutes after leaving the dock. Turns out, the beautifully elaborate carvings were too concentrated on the top of the boat and there wasn't enough weight on the bottom. Thing tipped over and sank like a stone - only to be lifted from the depths 300 years later - 100% intact. Amazing. One of the coolest things she has ever seen. Next came a visit to an international school in the British style ("jolly phonics!"), a charming supper in a funky underground cafe, and the most intense game of Egyptian Rat Screw since the CAAP smackdown of '02. She fled the city after visiting a Reggio Emilia preschool that she found extremely suspicious. More on that later.

Can you guess where she was?

Stockholm, Sweden!

Location #2

Franni was spotted...

Eating her weight in buffet food, taking in a cheesy Vegas-style show, pillaging the duty-free store and fending off the advances of creepy Turkish futbol hooligans who decided to (literally) sweep her off her feet and carry her away from the group - caveman style.

Can you guess where she was?

Creepshow City?

No, but close...

Booze Cruise on the Baltic Sea!

Location #3

Franni was spotted...

In an amazingly well-preserved Medieval city, the capital of a country most Americans have never heard of. She enjoyed the quaint architecture and quirky statues, and haggling with old Russian women at the wool market. Her gastronomic experiences were diverse: She drank the richest and most amazing hot chocolate in the cutest cafes, savored an authentic Medieval feast and ate antelope (though not all at the same time. That would be weird.). She learned Russian songs with 6 year-olds at a Waldorf School (as well as participated in a circle dance that involved grabbing each other's ears and noses - Oleg, please explain?) and observed the sketchiest Soviet kindergarten ever. Her accomplice? A woman from Trinidad, educated in Denmark, who married a Russian and moved to Estonia - and is one of the most fascinating people she has ever met. Then she listened to the "Love Song of a Migratory Bird."

Can you guess where she was?

Talinn, Estonia!

Location #4

After resting for a night in Copenhagen, she hopped a plane to a much more famous European city. Here, she was reunited with one of her most notorious henchmen (alias: Carrot Boy). She ate a three-course meal, partied with local students and had her breath taken away by one of the most famous cathedrals by moonlight.

Next she played 'princess' in a palace that no photo will ever do justice. However, the palace was taken captive by the dastardly Jeff Koons, which made the whole situation rather absurd. She then ate a nutella-banana crepe on the steps in front of Sacre-Coeur and fended off the advances of an over-eager business student from Tunisia who felt compelled to tell her his life story - only after making sure she was over 18 (Him: "in this country, it is illegal to do things with girl under 18, you understand?" Me: "oh, you don't have to worry. I'm over 18 and those things are never going to happen to you." Yet he still didn't get the hint. Even after I told him I was leaving to see my extremely jealous boyfriend, he tried to get my number.) After dark, she enjoyed the streets crammed with artists and tourists and music and energy and life... then some wonderful conversation with fellow world-travelers (!!!) from Australia, New Zealand, Austria, South Africa, etc...

The following day, David and I (3rd person is exhausting. Game over, gumshoes, I was in Paris.) went inside Notre Dame, picnicked in front of Sacre-Coeur, then walked along the Seine and picked out the houseboat we will retire on (classic sailboat, maybe with a garden on top?). We climbed up the Eiffel Tower and I made friends with a couple of little French boys who heard my speaking in English and declared, "I love American!" David left for class, and I walked back to Place de la Concorde, then along the Champs-Elysees to the Arc de Triomphe and back again. Another amazing meal followed at Le Polidor (sp?), where I learned how to drink wine like a real connoisseur.

Tuesday we went to the Musee d'Orsay for a Picasso/Manet exhibit, but stayed for the Impressionist, Post-Impressionist and Art Nouveau collections, as well as an exhibit about masks and another AMAZING feature on pastels. A girl from the hostel and I went to Cacao et Chocolat for the best hot chocolate in Paris, and then I met up with David and Papa Bear for another traditional French dinner. I had my first Parisian creme brulee. Life is good. We hit a jazz club afterward for amateur night - read: drunk American girls over-singing old Barbara Streisand songs - and almost got trapped in Gare du Nord. Not a place I would ever want to get trapped alone. Ever.

Wednesday David was at his internship at a cheese shop, so I was on my own for the morning. I went to a children's book exhibit at the Bibliotheque Francois Mitterand, which was super interesting and, oh yeah, entirely in French. I understood 90% of the information, mostly because it was geared toward children and their parents, but I was still pretty proud of myself. Also, I rediscovered "Where the Wild Things Are" (French title: Max et les Maximonstres). After that, I went to the happiest place on Earth: the French Cinematheque. I played with a zoetrope and watched "Serpentine Dance" the way Edison intended. There was a Melies exhibit with costumes and props from "A Trip to the Moon" and a really baller Dennis Hopper feature. Supper was with David's host family and the conversation? You guessed it - completement en francais. I think I held my own, though - merci beaucoup, Madame Minkoff! We then went walking around Monmartre and David was very sweet to indulge my flouncing about (I kind of forgot that I'm not really living in a 1950s musical or Truffaut film. Oops.). We got coffee at Amelie's cafe and stopped by the Moulin Rouge and Le Chat Noir. It was deliriously wonderful. 

Before I left, we went to Le Marais for the best falafel outside of Israel (ah.may.zing.) and I bought some challah from a kosher bakery because I really missed the stuff. Leaving Paris was really hard - as difficult as boarding the plane away from Israel. But I'll go back. I just have to.

But one day at a time, right? And tomorrow... I'm going to Russia!

Move on up toward your destination

I leave for Sweden in 9 hours. 45 minutes ago, I realized that there are only 2 pairs of clean underwear in my drawer and I have been wearing the same jeans for the past 3 days. While waiting for my laundry so that I can start packing, I'm writing a speedy, yet newsy entry.

Music:

I am addicted to motown/soul music. I don't know when or why this happened, but I actually cannot stop listening to the "curtis mayfield" and "marvin gaye" stations on last.fm. A day without Sam & Dave's "Soul Man" is truly a day without sun. OMG "My Girl" just came on - life is good.

Midterms:

Not awful. A lot of stuff needed to get done in 6 days (3 papers, 2 outlines, 2 exams, 1 oral exam), but I think they went well.

Yom Kippur:

I had an easier fast than usual, probably because I didn't understand people when they bitched about the lack of food/water (Danish: it's all Greek to me!). I had planned to crash at Chabad after Kol Nidre, so I arrived at 3PM, when Ruchel told me to. Um, the place was locked and empty. I rang the bell and nobody answered. Knocked on the door, nobody answered. After 10 minutes, I called Mom. Never in a million years did I think I would be trying to break into a freaking Chabad center. Finally a little girl came by.

"At m'daberet ivrit?" "Kayn! Kayn!" "Bayt chabad?" "Kayn, b'vakasha!"

And she let me in. Thank you, Temple Emunah Hebrew School.

I helped Ruchel the Rebbetzin and her 67 children chop vegetables - it reminded me of Shabbat at the Bayit at Wes, except Ruchel is less of a tyrant than D.Bar.

At dinner, Seth, Gil and I listened to an old man from Jutland pontificate on the history of Danish Jewry. It was really interesting, but Gil bristled when the man told him, "vous n'e^tes pas francais. Vous e^tes Juif." Interesting clash between old and new world Judaism - but maybe the man had a point? I don't know.

Kol Nidre was pretty good. The Great Synagogue is a wonderful location for it because of its majestic size and white and gold interior. I missed the cantorial stylings of David "Srebby" Srebnick at Emunah, but I found a Siddur like the ones we use at home, so that was nice. The inscription was from Tovah Feldshuh, an actress I greatly respect, so that was cool, too.

After services, I walked back to Chabad with Gil and we hung out with Yitzy the Rabbi and 3 Yeshiva boys, just shooting the shit about politics and religion and travel. I stunned Gil by perfectly translating a couple of articles in Le Monde (my French is better than I thought!) and learned about - ready for this? - action movies for ultra-Orthodox jews. I'll try to find some titles from Yitzy and let you know how they are. The Yesiva boys were cool, 2 were British and had cute little Paul McCartney accents when speaking, but when davening, they sounded like little old men from Ze Old Country.

Anecdote: the stairwell in Chabad echoes. You know how American kids test echoes by yelling out stupid things? One of the Yeshiva boys tried it out by going "Koooooooool Niiidreeeee."

Services were spent with my new friends who recognized me from Rosh Hashanah. Sharon from Stockholm and I bonded majorly. And I saw the cute little old grandma with the sweet grandchildren, who greeted me with a, "hello, American girl who misses her family!" She then invited me to her house for the breakfast.

At the Chabad breakfast (bagels and lox! And eggsalad and tuna salad!), the man from Uruguay introduced me ("Ah! Mrs. Boston!") to his son, who is considering spending a semester studying communications at BU. The father was pounding back the whiskey shots, as was the Rabbi and every man over 30. Gut yontif, indeed.

Jonathan's Birthday:

Jonathan turned 11 on Thursday, so Friday was his birthday party with his class from school and today was the family party. The kids were SO CUTE. The party was loosely structured - entertainment ranged from watching the popcorn in the popper, playing "CounterStrike" and watching "Jackass," jumping on the trampoline, freezedance (to Rihanna's "please don't stop the music," obvi) and charades. It was funny to watch the kids: boys on 1 couch, girls on another, things like that. And Jonathan has a cute little girlfriend. Her name is Alberte. Aww...

Culture Night:

After the party, I headed into the city with Gabi, Liza, Madeline and DeDe for KulturNatten, the night when all of the museums, monuments, cafes, etc. are open late with special events. We explored the ruins under Christiansborg with a flashlight, which wasA really neat. Then we wandered around the Stroget, City Hall and Radhusplasen. So many people were in the streets! Young, old, drunk, sober... I have never seen Copenhagen this crowded before! The cobblestones at Amager Torv were sticky from all the beer spilled - it felt like a frat house floor.

Hilarious moments:

"My ex-boyfriend always wore an orange sweatshirt."

"did you date Kenny from South Park?"

On the Metro, we met the Super Mario Brothers and Hunter S. Thompson.

(After getting toasted, sugared almonds)

"You can eat the nuts."

A drunk man dancing to "Get Down (You're the One for Me)" by the Backstreet Boys.

"Are people from the Czech Republic called Czech... Republicans?"

And, oh yes, the Lederhosen boys.

Many other amazing things happened, and several facebook albums shall be made, but I need to get ready for bed soon. Plus I didn't even mention...

The Canal Tour of Copenhagen

and

Jonathan's Birthday Party 2.0

(or, how I ate my weight in carbohydrates - twice).

Hopefully I won't forget after the trip to Sweden and Estonia. I just hope my clothes are dry enough to pack by now...

I am a terrible fangirl

NEW JENNY LEWIS ALBUM!!!!!

OMGOMGOOMGOMGGOGOGOMG

It dropped 2 weeks ago and I had NO IDEA. I was too busy losing my mind over the amazing new efforts by my other 2 favorite girl singers (Dar Williams and Amanda Palmer). Seriously, if M.I.A. had a new CD out now, it would be the 4 horseladies of the AWESOMEpocalyspe. (wait - does she? nope. just checked, haha)

OK, I am now listening to Acid Tongue via internet leaks, and, thus far, like what I hear. She had played "Carpetbagger" on the last couple RK tours, but with Blake or Johnathan Rice on male vocals. But, what's this? Her duet partner sounds familiar... OMG IT IS ELVIS COSTELLO! Oh, Jenny, you are true rock royalty now!

She sounds good, doing a lot more falsetto-y stuff with her voice, but I think her vocals were a lot stronger of Rabbit Fur Coat. This CD has none of the blue eyed soul from the Watson Twins collaboration, which I really liked, but it is good to hear her back in country-roots-Americana-rock. "The Next Messiah" rocks - classic blues with a driving White Stripes-y baseline, but the subject matter is pure Jenny (Christian hypocrisy and daddy issues). And I'm stoked that a plugged-in version of "See Fernando" made it on the album! Her performance on Conan, but I think it would have been better a little more stripped-down. All in all, I like the postmodern-meets-vintage, Brooklyn-meets-the-heartland vibe. Its what she does best.

Then again, there was no way I was not going to like the album!

I'm writin' 'bout the book I read

With the 45-minute commute every day, my reading time has increased dramatically. Here is a quick review of what I have read/am reading:

Goodbye, Columbus by Philip Roth
Goodbye, Columbus is a collection of fictional novellas and short stories about the postwar American Jewish diaspora, mostly in the New York/New Jersey area (of course.) "The Conversion of the Jews" is one of my favorite short stories, but I never finished the whole book, and the short story format lends itself well to the continuous interruptions of reading on busses and trains. I love Roth's no-frills, no-nonsense, no-bullshit style, it is a welcome change from some of the flashy writers I read this summer (Hunter S. Thompson, Tom Robbins and Elizabeth Gilbert). I think "Defender of the Faith" was my favorite. It is the story of a Jewish sergeant in the US Army who receives requests for special treatment from Jewish privates. The motives of the privates are ambiguous, and it is ultimately questions how the Jewish people are going to survive. Goodbye, Columbus is a very interesting, insightful read, but I wonder to what extent someone who has had little to no contact with the American Jewish community would appreciate the intricacies and complexities of the stories.

Favorite Quote:
"I'm not a planner, Brenda. I'm a liver."
"I'm a pancreas."

My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult

Not light reading. Picoult has written an extremely compelling and original story that continues to haunt me. It is the story of a family whose daughter Kate is diagnosed with leukemia. In order to save her, they genetically design a child, Anna, to become a perfectly-matched donor. After numerous surgeries on both girls, Kate's kidneys begin to fail, and Anna is required to give one of her own to her sister. This is the last straw: Anna files a lawsuit for medical emancipation from her family. The subsequent struggles explore medical practice, ethics, justice, the role of parent and child, honesty, lost love and how a family can burn itself out. The end is devastating. I really loved the book, but felt Picoult heaped the symbolism on where it really wasn't necessary. Also, each chapter is told from a different character's perspective, but she doesn't change her style enough to give each character a believably distinct voice. Overall, a genuinely significant work. Believe the hype.

Favorite quote:

Doubt thou the stars are fire,

Doubt thou the sun doth move,

doubt truth to be a liar,

but never doubt I love.

(from Hamlet)

The Complete Short Stories by Ernest Hemingway

Hemingway is a baller. No other words. This is an ongoing project - homeboy wrote a LOT.

Favorite quote:

psh...

Currently reading...

Black Mass: The True Story of an Unholy Alliance Between the FBI and the Irish Mob by Dick Lehr and Gerard O'Neill

I love Boston.

Reporters Lehr and O'Neill were following insider's theories about James "Whitey" Bulger's informant status for the FBI a decade before this was proven to be true. As a result, this book is argumentative, fiercely research and wholly brilliant. Much better than The Departed - and I really liked that movie!

Comment:

Sarah Palin kind of reminds me of Billy Bulger. Both are scrappy, hard-line conservatives. Both value showmanship - although, in a significant variation, Bulger successfully kept his family (including, to an extent, his mobster brother) out of the public eye - and maintaining their connection to your Average Joe. Palin is definitely a throwback to the showbiz politics (on the right and the left) of the mid-20th century. Think of the Democrat political machine Tammany Hall in New York. Palin comes from that tradition, she is nothing new. Except for one twist: now its a girl who is shaking you by the collar. Just a thought...

Over break, I'm hoping to finish Black Mass and also read The Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paolo Friere. I'll let you know how all that goes.

This week is heavy on the midterms and atoning, so I won't be updating much/at all. Then I'm off to Sweden, Estonia, France and Russia. Hopefully, I'll have time to write and reflect between trips.

**EDIT**

Music I'm currently enjoying:

Move On Up  by Curtis Mayfield

If I Could Build My Whole World Around You by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell

Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul

It's Alright by Dar Williams (Fountains of Wayne cover off the new album)

Vietnam by Bear Hands

After the Fall by X-Patriate (Alan J. Lipman)

Boston by The Dresden Dolls

Pierre by The Dresden Dolls (this one is for you, mom! Remember Ms. Wilson's class?)

...and pretty much the entire new Amanda Palmer album - especially "The Point of it All" and "Leeds United." Thanks to producer Ben Folds (!!!), it is a lot pop-ier than her stuff with the Dolls, but she hasn't lost any of her intensity. Also, check out the videos on youtube. Gnarly.

So this is the New Year (5759)

Happy Jew Year, everyone! Sorry I didn't update over the last couple of days, I tried to avoid using the computer on chag.

Needless to say, spending the High Holy Days (Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) with a continent's distance from my family and without any Jewish friends resulted in major homesickness on my part. The worst moment was when I realized that I have not given or received a hug in 6 weeks - and all of you should know how much I love hugs.

Walking up to "The Great Synagogue" on Krystalgade for Monday ma'ariv (evening services), I noticed that the entire building is surrounded by a high metal fence. There are no lamps or signs in front of the shul, but there are 2 security guards. I was shocked when they started interrogating me ("what is your business here?" "uh... to pray?"), and became fairly confused and disoriented. My thoughts consisted mostly of "What the crap am I doing in Denmark instead of Lexington, MA?" and "Oh my G-d Oh my G-d Oh my G-d," the latter of which, in retrospect is pretty ironic and hilarious. I think I looked like I was about to cry, because the guard eventually smiled at me and told me I wasn't the only DIS student there.



10 minutes later and relieved to be done with the Danish Inquisition, I walked into the sanctuary and quickly realized that it was Orthodox. I looked down, saw my bare elbows, and worried about being perceived as some Jezebel, but it was too late. I was already inside and couldn't keep my fleece on all evening.

The Great Synagogue is exactly what I'd imagined an old, European temple would look like. The sanctuary is HUGE - men sit on the main floor in front of the biggest aron kodesh (fancy closet that holds the Torah scrolls) I have ever seen. Women sit in a balcony on the sides and in the back of the room, per Orthodox tradition.

Though the building looked just like I expected, the sound of the room was odd. The cantor was positively incoherent and sang far too quickly; basically, he chanted the Hebrew like Danes speak Danish. It was impossible for me to keep up, not that it would have mattered, because no one in the shul was singing along. Most of the women and girls were chit-chatting at obnoxious volumes (Mom, I'm sorry for all of the times I got mad when you would talk at Emunah. These ladies make you seem like a freakin' churchmouse [shul-mouse?]). As for the men, they were also quiet, leaving the praying to the cantor and a small choir of 7 men.

Dinner was at the Rabbi's flat inside a wing of the synagogue. I found a couple of Prozdor girls among the crowd, but our conversations were brief and stilted. Turns out, I was the only DIS student who came without a posse of at least 3 friends. Fabulous. The moments leading up to dinner were painful reminders of why I had to be dragged kicking and screaming to USY events back in the day.

As I resigned myself to an evening of delicious food yet sour company, the girl sitting in front of me at services asked if she and her friend could sit at our table. I might have pulled over a chair with a little too much enthusiasm, but they didn't seem to mind. They were students from Tel Aviv, learning about the fairy tale tradition in Denmark and Norway for 3 months. The Israeli girls and I talked the whole evening, debating politics, religion, food and culture (after playing a quick round of "Jewish Geography" - one has a cousin who goes to Wellesley College! The other was a counselor at YJ!) No real revelations of note: they worry about Obama's "being good for Israel," doubt Livni's potential for success in forming a government, and think I am compromising the integrity of Rosh Hashanah by taking the Metro on chag. Needless to say, we mostly disagreed on the aforementioned subjects, but I really enjoyed talking to them. They invited me to Chabad for lunch after services the next day, and I accepted.

Now, David Baranger, I can feel your eyes rolling all the way from Paris. Yes, I did go to Chabad and yes, I did have a nice time and no, I am not currently wearing a sheitel and planning on having 7 sons named "Yossi." (For those of you who don't know, Chabad is an ultra-Orthdox brand of Judaism who kind of proselytize to less observant Jews) The Rabbi and Rebetzin were young, warm, funny and very kind. I am planning to stay with them for Yom Kippur so I don't have to deal with the commute to and from the city.

Lunch was essentially a refugee camp for wandering Jews. We had a Holocaust survivor-cum-cab driver-cum-businessman from Latvia (now Miami). We had a French Jew who is studying economics/partying in Århus. We had a former merchant marine from Denmark who has sailed around the world. I met people from Uruguay, Morocco, England, Israel and the US. We talked about travels and politics and education... everything! Its like that song we learned in Hebrew School; "wherever you go, there's always someone Jewish..."

Lunch lasted for 3 hours. I forgot about the different courses, so I loaded up on salads (7 or 8 different kinds! Plus hummus and olives and other yummy, Israeli tapas things) and challah before we got to the main course, goulash and rice and kugel and "modern tzimmes" (carrots and sweet potatoes in puff pastry - delicious!).

Funny story: on the way to taslich, we passed a man walking his chocolate lab. The dog affectionately hopped up on my legs, and I gave him a good ear tousel. Gil, with whom I had been walking, ran away. When I finally caught up with him, he looked at me with this glare of disdain that only the French can give and declared, "I 'ate dogs." It was such a French stereotype, I almost fell down laughing. I don't think Gil got the joke...

The next day I came back for more of the same. The food and international company were wonderful - I got invited to join a Jewish women's group! I heard more differing perspectives on the election (apparently, Obama is a self-proclaimed Muslim with connections to the mafia who should get deported. That one was from an American)! I got invited to join a Jewish women's group! Good times.

Anyway, shanah tovah tikateivu - may you be inscribed in the book of life! And have a good and sweet year.
Ahava,